We’ve all had our share of “I love you buts…” and while it is hard to admit, we might actually be better off because of some, if not all of them! With a little hindsight you can often see how “I love you, but…” can be a door to a better understanding of what you want out of your life, and ultimately achieving it. Realizing that loving someone is not enough can be emotionally devastating, but also life altering in a positive way. While you may love them, if there is something about them that does not make the two of you a perfect match it is advisable to acknowledge that as early on as possible in a relationship. This may seem unfitting when you are in the throws of a passionate love affair, but when considering whom you might spend the rest of your life with, there are many factors that are suddenly very important, things that understandably may not have seemed relevant when your eyes met across a crowded room! There are little things, like how they brush their teeth, or the bad jokes they tell, that really, when it comes down to it, are just that, little things. Then there are the big things, like dependencies, whether to have children and other differing future goals, that can lead to a sad end if not acknowledged early on.
LIFE Published December 14, 2007